One Year

The year is approachingI try not to think about it
Why are the memories so clear
So distinct, so real
So fresh?
You were just here
But you weren’t.
It was a complete year ago.
So much happens in a year
But this year went so fast
Tell me what you were thinking
All those times in pain
Did you ever know your life would end so soon?
Why do our last memories of you have to be
Painful?
I love to think about you
To remember you when you were here
But it definitely also hurts
Because then that brick hits
You’re not here anymore.
Here I am, growing up
In college
And you’re already with Jesus
That part makes me smile
That part makes it not hurt so bad.
There’s so much more to life
Than homework, boys and alcohol.
God created us
Solely to worship Him
To bring Him glory through our lives
In order to gain fulfillment.
That’s amazing.
I just wish I could talk to you again.
Imagining it makes it seem real
Like you’re still here
Like the year of your passing
Isn’t steadily approaching.
It’s been a year. Wow.
A full year.
So much has happened this year.
But the memories are still fresh…

My heart hurts again.

(12/1/06)